*Sitting in a coffee shop indulging in chocolate and fun conversation a few days ago with two of my friends:

Friend #1: "I met this guy at the DMV and he asked me for my phone number. I said no, of course. He was way too young. But then as I was walking out he asked me for a favor. He asked if I could please call his phone because he couldn't find it. So I called it so he could hear it ring, and then he could find it easier. He thanked me, then I left. When I got into my car, GUESS WHAT YOU GUYS? (right about here her voice gets really high pitched as it always does when she's sharing something really incredibly hard-to-believe-amazing) My phone rings and it's the guy from the DMV! He got my number off of his caller I.D. Is that SMART OF HIM OR WHAT?"

Friend #2 and I looked at each other and laughed.

And laughed.

Then laughed some more.

Friend #1: "What's so funny?"

We took the kids to Ponderosa this past weekend. Yeah, I know! We already went to the snow last weekend but that trip was a last minute trip. This trip has been planned for a while with our friends (whom I've nicknamed for the sake of my blogs) Teen Barbie and Cabana Boy.

We heard it was supposed to storm all week so we went out and looked for snow chains for our truck. But since our 4x4 Ford F-250 Diesel truck has over sized wheels there wasn't a shop in town that carried our size. We decided we'd just ride up with Teen Barbie and Cabana. It worked out because we got to talk all the way up and our boys got to goof off and have fun as well.

On the way up we saw a deer and so we were like COOL... then we stopped to take a picture and another head popped out. Then another one. Then another. Four total. It's always amazing to me when we get to see "wildlife" so closely like that. There's just magical about them and it brings you closer to nature. You feel as if you share a common bond. Both of us are God's creations sharing God's blessings of earth and health and family.

After we snapped the shot we looked down the mountain and their were a boatload of them. Not really a BOAT obviously. It's just a figure of speech. We sat admired nature at it's finest then Cabana Boy or Mr. Twinkie? I can't remember who? Went "BANG" as in, he just shot one. turds.. LOL Our conversation quickly shifted into talking about how deer come out of the woodwork until it's hunting season then all of a sudden there's not one to be found.

Of course we only know this because we've heard people talk. We don't hunt or own guns or any of that. I'm too chicken to allow any of that stuff in my house. I'm not like my friend Woofs who not only has guns, she also has a ninja sword and other such oddities. Don't mess with my Woofs, that's all I'm saying! ha

But, en ought about that and back to my trip....

YES this IS in fact the road we drove through to get to the cabin. All the roads in Ponderosa were like this. Which was cool because it meant we could ride the snowmobiles on the street if we wanted to. We didn't have just go out and find trails.

But of course we did anyways.. (I didn't drive one.. just for the record.. I was just resting when Teen Barbie snapped the picture.)

Mr. Twinkie and I ate shiznit trying to get up the hill to Dome Rock and him and Cabana Boy had to dig out the snowmobile. 

Here's Teen Barbie waiting for the boys to get done digging the other snowmobile down the hill. We took pictures of each other and talked. At one point Teen Barbie went back down the hill and asked them for the bottle opener.

"Throw it." she said. "I don't want to walk all the way down. I'm tired!"

That tiny snowman was already there but when the guys finally get there we tell them they took so long that we had time for me pose and Autum made a snow sculpture of me. hahaha

They finally made it up and look at Mr. Twinkie's face... hahahah he's still trying to catch his breath!

Here he is minutes later. STILL trying to catch his breath. hahahah

"I'm the king of the wooooooooorld!" ~Cabana Boy

Here are my boys Annequin and Big Mickey in their "snowmaflauge" tee hee. And of course Teen Barbie and Cabana Boy's boys.

The view from Dome Rock is amazing!

Here's Cabana Boy "ridin dirtay"

Well, that's pretty much it. We were so tired that day we didn't do much else. Well, other than a few snowball fights with the kids. Mr. Twinkie grilled some T-Bones, we ate big, then went to bed.

On our way out of Ponderosa we had an awesome greeting! Somebody had taken the time to build this snowman on the outskirts of town.

"Y'all come back now, yah here?"

larger view

My son whom I've nicknamed Annequin for the sake of my blogs and I were cuddling on the couch watching t.v. It's our favorite thing to do after a long days work. In fact, today he even took a shower early so we could have extra cuddle time.

I was planning on taking a long bath and read a book after dinner and helping with homework. But HECK! Who in their right mind is going to turn down EXTRA cuddle time, right?

There's nothing good on t.v so we finally settle on a movie on HBO. It's a movie he's seen before so he's half paying attention, and half talking to me about his "dreams and goals" of playing professional football (the movie was about football) and about how his third grade friends beat some fourth graders at soccer today, etc etc. I didn't even think he was paying attention to the movie.

Until one of the characters tells the other, "I'm sorry for your loss."

Annequin looks up quickly and asks, "Mom, why do people say they're sorry if they're not even the ones that did it?"

I responded, "I don't know honey."

I was gonna leave it at that but I knew that this is one of those instances where he wasn't asking just to ask. He really wanted to know. And I knew he didn't mean just on the show.

He wanted to know why all those people a few months ago at his grandmother's funeral were "sorry" for our loss. Why apologize for something they had no power to stop? They didn't cause gramma's death, did they?

So I added, "Sometimes people see how much pain you feel in your heart because you've lost somebody you really loved and they just wish that they could take that pain from you. They are sorry that you feel so much pain in your heart and they are sorry that there's nothing they can do to make you feel better."

Annequin smiled.  I could see his little shoulders perk up like a little man and I was glad that I found the right words for him. I could tell that he was satisfied with my answer and that because I had an answer it meant that his question was a valid question. I could see the gratitude in his eyes that I took his question seriously.

And it made me cry with my own gratitude. I could have blown him off and told him to hush so I could watch the movie.

I could have told him NO to extra cuddle time and taken my very needed long hot bath to soothe my viejita (old)aching body.

Instead it was like God patted me on the back and stopped me from my busy hectic day and said, "ahora mija, toma el tiempo para tu familia. Ponles atencion a los ninos. Lo demas no importa."

*"Today, my daughter, take the time for your family. Pay attention to the children. The rest is not important."

 I'm really surprised more people don't go to Shirley Meadows. The place is so kick back and fun to learn to snowboard or ski. No pressure.

It's right above Bakersfield. It has a tubing park? Is that what it's called? And there is a free snow park right below within walking distance. You can take your own food if you want.

They even have picnic tables set up where you can watch people board or ski and even fall on their butts from time to time and laugh.

Oh shut up! You know you'd laugh too.

I took my boys out this past weekend and they had a blast.

Even my teenage son who has a season pass to Sierra Summit enjoyed the smallness of Shirley Meadows.

 We left about 8:00am and met up with Cabana Boy and Teen Barbie and their kids.

We took an ice chest full of sodas and waters and sandwiches so we didn't spend a lot in their snack store. This saves you a lot of money especially if you're a starving artist or a big family like us.

Of course take some money anyways because you can't not AT LEAST buy a hot chocolate right? I mean, what else are you going to drink your Baileys or Kahlua with right? Oops I mean... ummmm... 

 Anyways.. here are some pictures. I hope you enjoy!

YES I will in fact stay here all day and guard the food and drinks. AH DRINKS? Oh yeah!

At Shirley Meadows kids under five get a FREE lift ticket with an accompanying adult. Also, if it's your first time boarding or skiing you get one free lesson! (I think it's free? If they charge it's not much) Which is awesome because since I don't snowboard, you can't exactly expect me to teach the kids how to right?

First rule about snowboarding? We don't talk about snowboarding. Second rule of snowboarding? We don't quote old played out movies during snowboarding blogs.

This was Big Mickey before their lesson:

And here he is after! OK so it's not much better. But at least he's on his feet, right?

They even get some one on one instruction!

We stopped midday for a quick bite to eat:

HEY DON'T BOGART ALL THE CHIPS DUDE!

speaking of bogarting.. ummm TWINKIE? Why are your eyes so droopy? Are you smoking some wakky tabbaky?

NOOOOOO! I'm just tired. THERE! Is this better?

OK! Well that was it for now. We're going up to Ponderosa this weekend to stay in Teen Barbie's family's cabin. Wish us luck. It's snowing and snowing and snowing there right now. Which is great because that's the whole point of this trip, right? But it's a bit hard to drive in!

So much has happened the past ...oh gosh.. I don't know? Six months? Maybe longer? I don't even really know. Life is a blur. Does that happen to you too? I guess that's why they say "Life happens when you're busy living!"

Anyways, I won't go into details but I will say this!!! It's definitely reality time. Time to count my blessings if I hadn't' already. Time to appreciate the small stuff. Even more than before. And time to take stock in what I what.

So with that... what do I have? I'll tell you what I don't have! No, actually I won't go there. It's too personal.

Instead, I'll share with you my New Years vacation which started off like this:

Me: "Insert manager's name here I know that I don't have any more vacation or sick time left because I used it all up when my mother in law was in the hospital a few months ago, BUT we've had this trip planned for a year now and I'd really like to be able to take the time off. And YES I know it will be UNPAID time off. I'm cool with that."

He was kind enough to give me the week off and so we went....

We were gonna meet up with our friends in Dumont the next day but Mr. Twinkie decided to take off the night before. So we loaded our trailer with our clothes, food, blankets, ice chests full of Tecates and Negra Modelos (oh and sodas too) and headed out.

As soon as we got ON the freeway our neighbor (who was also going to Dumont but with another group) called and told Mr. Twinkie that HWY 58 was CLOSED due to high winds and so we turned back.

Thank goodness because I was NOT looking forward to driving by OURSELVES in  case something happened like a blowout, or whatever.

*Incidentally the next morning one of our friends took off on their own and ended up running out of gas. yeah, I KNOW! I won't mention any names *coughG.I.JOE and JANEcough* but I will post a picture of the culprits!

We made a few pit spots. One of them being at a dirty ol' truck stop (MY FAVORITE because of their bathroom graffiti which you can read about by clicking HERE) And another stop (again) for gas and a quick bite to eat at Del Taco!

Of course with my daughter being a vegetarian and me not liking fast food the men ate while me and her took off to Subway and Starbucks.

We finally got to the Dumont Dunes and secured our favorite spot by the small dunes and the POTTY. Then we waited for everyone else to get there. Over 6 trailers in all. Nice caravan, right? I forgot to take a picture of it of course! BUT here is the infamous potty!

 Yes! It's true. Marker number 2 is our favorite spot. Close enough to the small dunes so our boys can play. Also close enough to the "gold mines" which the kids love to explore!

We then unloaded everything and Mr. Twinkie took the kids on a ride.

It's soooo neat to see them take off. They are getting to be so grown up. Gosh! I still remember when they rode the teeny tiny quads that aren't bigger than the Hot Wheels ones you can buy at any toy store. They wouldn't go too fast and it was fun to watch them ride in circles IN our campsite. And I was happy! See here? I'm happy!

Now they take off on "big boy rides" and it's a bit scary when I think they are riding too fast or they try to "jump" a tiny dune/hill or whatever. ACK! Ayudame Dios!

Still, we have a lot of fun and enjoy scenery like THIS:

And of course at night we hang around the fire and tell tall tales and tease each other and talk about old times. OLD TIMES? DANG I'm getting old! I mean LOOK! I am the mother of a TEENAGER! (well OK TWO teenagers) When did that happen?

It wasn't long ago that they looked like THIS!

And NOW I'm talking about OLD TIMES? Ay ay ay! Caramba!!

But, I digress...

After all the fun FUN desert FUN we came home just in time for new years eve in which Mr. Twinkie fell fast asleep before 9:00 pm.. Teen Twinkie the boys and I sat around waiting for the new year while drinking "champagne"

Some of us had too much to drink and passed out. Ah... well! There's always that ONE in the group, right? Tee hee.

Others of us said NO to champagne and YES to another bad habit... yes folks! Guitar Hero strikes again! Legends of Rock is even MORE addicting than the others!

And that is all. That was my wonderful New Years Twinkielicious adventure! I hoped you enjoyed it!

Once upon a time there lived this Princess Zoey. She belonged to a family that didn't have room for her. They already owned a bigger dog and this dog was just NOT having another pet in the house. This dog would bark and bark at Zoey and make her do all the house chores and sweep up the fire cinders and do all the laundry and wash dishes and... oh wait, wrong fairy tale.

But the part about the other dog is true. She then was adopted into a home full of love and happiness. The kids played with her from sun up to sundown. Zoey loved everyone and took turns sleeping with her family.

Sometimes she'd sleep with mom and dad in their big California King Sized bed. Sometimes she slept with her brother whether it be on the top bunk, the bottom bunk, or even just napping on the couch after a full day of football.

Zoey went everywhere with her family even the hospital to welcome a new cousin into the family. She played outside with her brothers and so all the neighborhood kids called Zoey their friend.

One horrible day Zoey went outside to make her rounds as always. But this day she would not make it back alive. Zoey was hit by a van Friday January 11th. It was a sad day at the Twinkie household.

We all cried and cried because we lost a wonderful companion, friend, sister, daughter. Zoey was not just a pet, she was family.

We will miss you Zoey!

I can see it falling apart in front of my eyes. My heart starts racing. The sadness quickly overwhelms me and I feel like crying. I can't believe it just happened.

I hold my breath because I know if I don't, I'm going to start crying and I won't be able to stop.

My vision gets blurry as my eyes betray me and swell up with tears. I think to myself, "WHY ME? Why? This stuff always happens to me. Just when things start to look up something ALWAYS happens. WHY? WHY?"

I can see myself mentally throwing a tantrum. I mentally put my fist up to the air and defy God to answer me. "WHY DO YOU ALLOW THIS TO HAPPEN? WHY?"

What have I done to deserve this?

My emotions start to take over my body and I feel like falling on the ground and pounding the earth as if it was mother nature and earth's fault that my candy cane fell apart.

In front of my eyes.

As I was tearing off the wrapper.

Then I look up and realize that life is really happening outside of this moment. And I laugh at my silliness. Dropping a candy cane in the grand scheme of things is NOTHING. It's a candy cane. Get over it. Go buy another one.

I laugh some more then I get back to work.  

A few hours later, I fall off a step. HARD.

 It hurts but I laugh.

"WHY?" I laugh. "Why does this always happen to me?"

I giggle some more and I can't stop laughing.

I mean, come on! Only me, right? This sort of stuff only happens to me. I shake my head in disbelief and then keep on laughing as I wobble off to make copies of the report I was holding.

larger view

"My life sucks" that is what was so poetically written as graffiti on the bathroom wall of the busy Gas station/Truck stop in Barstow on our way to Dumont last week.

"My life sucks" there those words stood in red marker for the world to see.

I can only imagine what poor, tortured life this person was living that would lead them to write those words as a plea for someone to help them or maybe even just as a way to express what they know in their hearts but can't quite express out loud yet.

"My life sucks." Right under it, in different colored ink and writing it said, "So change it."

As I was sitting on that toilet reading the many messages left by others before me fighting the urge to add my own, those two little sentences stuck in my mind like an earworm.

"My life sucks."

"So change it."

I could hear them over and over and over in my mind the rest of the trip and it took me back to a time when my life DID in fact suck.

Until I decided to do something about it.

It really wasn't that hard. In fact, the hardest part was just taking that first step. The second hardest part is watching as people around me I once thought of as my best friends react to the changes I made in my life.

So does your life suck? Then CHANGE IT! It's easy. Just change it! Get rid of the negativity in your life including your attitude. And CHANGE IT! 

There will be some positive reactions. But more than likely there will just be negative ones and that's OK! After all, birds of a feather flock together right? So more than likely the people that have become your best friends along the way are leading the same tortured lives as you wether it be alcohol, abusive spouse, abusive boss, shitty friendships, or your own shitty attitude. GET RID OF IT!

Your true friends will follow. The ones that are your friends only because they are exactly like you but have no desire to change... well, they will eventually turn on you as you gradually make those positive changes.

Don't be upset.

It's nothing personal.

It just that you will no longer have anything in common with them. And that's OK. In fact, that's the point, right?

Eventually you will notice that positive people will start to gravitate towards you. After all, birds of a feather flock together, right?

Listen, I'm not here to make light of anyones troubles, ok? And I know that we all have different levels of "shitty lives" from having a shitty job, or kids that push us around, or friends that take advantage of us, or 20 pounds we'd like to lose, or a job that pays peanuts, or we're alcoholics or drug addicts, WHATEVER!

I'm just saying if your life sucks, you have the power to CHANGE IT. So do it. When's a better time than 2008, right?

Sit back, and enjoy your new life. and realize that leading a tortured life takes way MORE effort than leading a happy one.

Then you can say, "My life sucks, so I changed it"

Happy New Year everyone!

~Twinkie

New Years Resolutions anyone? Yeah, me either! 

 If fact the last time I can remember making any way was back in the day when I was younger and actually had energy to make resolutions.

Now I'm too old, too content with my life, TOO set in my ways and could give a hot damn if somebody doesn't like it!

But that doesn't mean that everyone else feels the same way! CLICK HERE to enjoy this bloggers funny rendition of her New Years Resolution, then read my response!

~twinkie