Previous Posts
Of life as a single woman...at Fifty-Two
I CHOOSE
I choose to be different than others in my age group
I refuse to be labeled old at fifty-two
I reserve the right to shock with my behavior
I choose to listen to the old songs of The Strokes
and Mathisyahu and Amy Winehouse
And rappers that share wisdom with the rest of us
I choose to go to a concert at the House of Blues
I am OK with being labeled strange by so called friends
Just because I am content and happy with myself
Having no need for the company of men
Enjoying life at fifty-two just as it comes
With every twist and turn
Tomorrow’s joys disguised as today’s pain
I choose and love to go to sleep at
I was always a night owl
As long as the energy remains
To clean the kitchen and organize the drawers
While all the neighbors are asleep
And my studio apartment is
The only dwelling on the block with lights ablaze
And windows shining bright into the night
I choose to love my life
I choose to be grateful
For what I have been given, more than some
A life of joy and peace after the storm
Enough to make me someone who can say
I am surrounded and entwined by love
And so much more than I deserve
I choose and love to be
The woman in the neighborhood
Who returns balls to noisy neighbor’s kids
Even though I will say
The thought of shiny knife through plastic ball
On more than one occasion crossed my mind
I choose to be the single woman
Who chooses to love and to be loved
Someone who knows too well that life is short
And that a little sympathy and care
Can change a life and so can change the world
I choose to be happy and care free
To accept wedding and birthday invitations
And take a break from the routine
And laugh and dance while I enjoy
The company of friends
And to go home at the end of the evening
and still be up by
Listening to my favorite music
The smoky voice of Amy Winehouse
Suits me just fine at 3 or
A reprise of the Seventies takes me back
In ever present waves of memories
Of love and friendship
And feeling indestructible
And drinking life in giants gulps
Feeling that I would live forever
I accept and choose OK
To be criticized and talked about
By some who think they know me
And who feeling better or holier than me
Choose to be judge and jury of my life
I choose to ignore the sting
Of careless or carefully constructed
Words and actions
Aimed at inflicting pain and anger
Colored by the weakness of humanity
Fed by the curse of ignorance
Fueled by a random hate
Accompanied on their way
By broken dreams and empty life
I choose and gracefully accept
To be called younger than my years
And happily accept the comment that I look
“Way younger than fifty-two”
It goes so perfect with the way I feel
I’ve always said and think
That I never got quite past thirty-two
I choose and accept
The fight of everyday life
The economic boundaries of present situation
The reality of Monday’s 9 to 5
The daily energy I spend on doing well enough
To feed my body and my soul with joy
With renewed knowledge
With new desires and hope
With reborn energy
To go on to Tuesday and so on
I choose to be a comfort
A secure port
The ever present second home
The one to run to
For the 3 that have my blood
Coursing through their veins
A stepping stone in case of need
A shelter from the storm
An oasis of life and love
I choose not to judge people on appearance
The actions of a person
Show the true measure of their being
I choose not to live life in fear
For my personal safety
The darkness of the night is my best friend
I choose not to give up expecting
That someday
I’ll have the love of a good man
And not because of need alone
More along the lines that follow
“My testament in life:
I will never give up the love of men
I refuse to believe there are no good ones left
I refuse the common saying
That they are all, either married or gay
I refuse to accept
That in this infinite universe of possibilities
I’ll never know the love of a good man”
Be it the words upon my stone:
“Her faith in men
and in humanity in general never waived”
Comments
:-)